Parking Lots!

18 Sept 09

A heartening narrative from one of our female students-by-proxy. This incident took place last week in an apartment parking lot:

"At 11:30 pm, I had just returned to my apartment from a visit with friends. I was alone in my car. I noticed a man (no one I recognized) walking in the parking lot, but he was keeping up a constant pace and seemed to be walking toward his car, paying no attention to me. So, I concluded that he probably didn't represent a threat.

I grabbed my purse and keys, got out of the truck, and locked the door. The moment I shut the door, I noticed the man had changed directions was now walking directly toward me. I made eye contact.

Authoritatively, and with as much voice-projection as possible, I said, ' Sir, you need to stop coming towards me.'

He slowed his pace. I said again, 'Sir, you need to stop walking toward me and go the other way.'

He stopped at a distance of fifteen feet and said,

'I just want to know if you have a plastic bag. Mine's broken, and my stuff is falling everywhere.'

I saw nothing in his hands, and repeated,

'Sir, you need to turn around and walk the other way.'

'Okay,' he replied, 'I will, but do you have a bag I can have?

'I can't help you,' was my rejoinder, as I was determined not to be drawn into a conversation.

'... but my stuff is falling everywhere,' he pleaded.

Again, I said, 'I'm sorry sir. Move on. I can't help you.'

'... I live a couple of miles away,' he went on

'I can't help you. Now, turn around and get away from me,' I repeated several times.

He finally walked away, mumbling something about how he 'didn't mean nothing.'

I immediately broke contact and retreated to my apartment. I then called security and told them what had happened.

I'm thankful that I remembered I needed to talk as loudly as possible, so that witnesses would notice commotion.

Of course, in retrospect I wondered if the man had a legitimate motive. Maybe he was disabled! Then, I reminded myself that none of that is important. I needed to aggressively disengage and get away from this guy. I did the only thing that made sense!

My initial response was a direct reflection of my training. I knew what to say and what posture to use, and is worked! Fortunately, I knew what to do.

In the end, no one was hurt, nor even inconvenienced.

Most importantly, I realized that I am capable of remaining calm and thinking on my feet. I also realized the power of personal confidence and body language. It was a priceless lesson, one that will not be forgotten!"

Comment: Another success story that will never make any headline! This woman knew what to do, and was successful in disengaging without having to escalate to physical force.

Parking lots and driveways are the most dangerous places in our civilization. Treat them as such!

You have to have a plan! Otherwise, you'll have to make one up on the fly. That will lead to hesitation and impotence, and a poor result!

/John